Don’t Idolize Relationships

I have been meaning to write about relationships for a while now but I often hold back because I felt for someone who’s not in a “relationship”, talking (and giving advice) about dating relationships can seem a bit awkward but then I realized that, the fact that I am not experiencing something doesn't mean I have no idea about it.

Same way the fact that someone is experiencing something doesn't mean that they have all the knowledge about it. That been said, I pray this note helps and blesses someone.

Recently a bosom (girl) friend of mine got engaged on her birthday and as I stirred at her finger with the beautiful golden ring on it, it dawned on me “Emmanuel you are single”. For a moment, my countenance dropped but I smiled through it.

There are so many of us desiring to be in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex and that is good. Our desire to be in a relationship is not an ungodly desire but a healthy desire God has put in us however, we must not be careful so we don’t idolize relationships or become desperate about it.

There is danger when we idolize relationships and even more danger when we get desperate about it.

When we become obsessed with wanting someone or needing someone or being in a relationship to a point it becomes the only thing we think about, it has become an idol. An idol is anything wanted/desired more than God.

Desperation leads to depression and there are many people who are depressed because they don’t have that special person in their life. I have heard people say “if I don’t have a relationship I am nothing. If I don’t have companionship, I’m nothing. If I don’t have him/her, I’m nothing to the point they lower their standards and compromise their values in other to have someone.

What they are saying in essence is that a relationship (with a human being) is what gives them their worth. They are idolizing relationships and that is wrong. God never intended for us to intensively need anyone.

When we think about relationships at all, in every relationship, our relationship with God must come first and unless we have a meaningful viable relationship with the Lord Jesus ourselves, we shouldn't go any further in building a relationship with anyone else.

Our first and most important relationship is the one we have with God through Jesus. Every other relationship is secondary to this one. God wants us to want Him more than we want anyone. It is in direct relationship to our walk with Christ that everything else falls into line.

One of the major problems with most of us (especially single people) is that we want a human more than they want Jesus and that is an anomaly. How can we seek a person more than we seek the God who created us?

God wants to be first in our lives and He is not going to negotiate that spot. If your relationship with God is a mess trust me every other relationship in your life (family relationship, friendship relationship, marriage relationship, courtship) will be even a greater mess.

Jeremiah 9:23-24 tells us not to boast of anything but that whoever boasts should boast in this, that he understands and knows God. The only thing we are allowed to boast off is our relationship with God.

How we love God will determine how we love others (and our spouse for those that are married). Our commitment to God will determine our commitment to our others/spouse. If someone cannot be faithful in the walk with God, what makes you think they will be faithful to you?

Our relationships are supposed to help us grow spiritually, emotionally, make us holy and push us closer to Christ not away from Him so if your relationship isn't pushing you closer to Christ, making you more holy but leading you to sin, you need to break it off.

Let go of every meaningless relationships and focus on your relationship with God. Any relationship that interferes with your relationship with God is a dangerous relationship and need to be cut off.

In as much as we may want companionship, we must never pursue someone unless we ourselves first have a relationship with God and before you allow anyone to pursue your heart, make sure they are pursuing God's heart first. God must be our first priority.

Our worth doesn't come from people (we should know this by now) our true worth comes from God and only HE (not people) can fill whatever voids that’s in our lives. Some relationships fail but a relationship with God lasts forever.

It should be everyone’s goal to build a relationship with GOD first before beginning a relationship with anyone else.

For those in (whatever kind of) relationships, make sure your relationships honor God. Have it in mind that God will not bless a relationship He is not involved in so make Christ the center of every of your relationships.

For does desiring a relationship, like I said in opening, your desire to have a relationship is a healthy desire but it shouldn't consume your heart. Be contented with your relationship with God and if you don’t have a relationship with God, begin now to seek Him with the whole of your heart before you seek anyone.

I know this isn't popular opinion and not many will agree with me on this nonetheless, it is the truth. We shouldn't seek the creature more than we seek the creator – that’s idolatry.

I desire to have a relationship with (none other than) my future spouse but I want my relationship with God more. Christ’ coming is imminent and all of us must live in light of His coming. I don’t know about you but as for me, I will trade anything I mean everything even what makes me most happy to be with the Lord.

At the end of day, a relationship with God is the most important relationship anyone can have so which is more important to you; your relationship status with God or your relationship with status a human?  Don’t idolize relationships.

Just Sharing My Thought

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Grace and Peace ♥