What do you mean when you say, “I love you?”

One thing we are all guilty of as a people is “we all say things we don’t mean” from time to time. I do it, you do it, and everyone does it. I however want us to realize words are so powerful that we cannot afford to keep saying things we don’t mean.

God created the entire universe with words. Words are that powerful. The Bible tells us death and life is in the power of the tongue. – Proverbs 18:21 and in Matthew 12:36 scripture says “I tell you that every idle word that men speak, they will give account of it in the Day of Judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

We have to learn to be so careful with our words because they carry such great weight. Since the day I read the above verse, I became extremely careful with what I say. We all need to grow to a point where we only say things we mean.

Someone recently asked me this question (what do you mean when you say I love you?) via www.ask.fm/emmasensation and I have been meaning to write about it for quite some time.

To begin, I would like us to consider what Jesus told his disciples and by extension all of us before He departed earth.  “A new commandment I give unto you, that ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.  By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another. -  John 13:34-35

From the above text, you’d realize that for the believer, love is not an option. It is a must, it is a command. God expects us to love (not only those that love us but) everyone including known enemies.

So when I was asked the question “what do you mean when you say I love you?” I had to think deep and by the way I’m such a deep thinker.

In our culture today, to say “I love you” at any level has become too easy. As a matter of fact, many people use this powerful phrase loosely. In effect, its true meaning has become so blurred.

Our confusion about “I love you” is complicated by our too casual use of the word "love." We love everything. We love shoes! We love Music! We love chocolate. And we love God. By the time we have finished loving everything, we are not even sure what the word means anymore.

And oftentimes, when some people say “I love you”, what they mean is, I love you but only until a newer, cooler, more comfortable friend comes along that I love more. Then my love moves on. This is often the case because many do not understand love in its proper context as God intended it.

In the Bible, 1Corinthians 13 to be precise, Love is defined in its purest, clearest and simplest term. And until we understand love the way God intended, we may not even be sure of what we mean when we say the phrase “I love you”.

When I say "I love you”, this is what I mean….

When I say “I love you”, I mean: I will be patient to you and I will be kind to you. I will not be envious of you, and never boast to you, and I will never be proud to you. I will not be rude or self-seeking. I will not be easily angered and will not keep record of your wrongs.

When I say "I love you," I mean: I will not delight in evil but I will rejoice with the truth. I will protect you and always trust you. I mean: I will always hope and persevere with you because this is what I love you means to me.

So people, the next time you want to use those very valuable words, understand what you are saying and please choose to live up to your words.

What do you mean when you say the “I love you?” 

Just Sharing My Thought
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Dear Future Wife – DFW

A while back, #DearFutureWife was trending and twitter and I jumped on it and did a few tweets. Apparently, some people liked my tweets so much that they favorite and retweet them and I got a couple of DM’s to tweet more on DearFutureWife  so this time, I decided to put it a note form so you too can enjoy it so here we go!

Before I jump on the topic proper, I want to say this for the purpose of clarity. I have had a lot of people ask me if, I was married or engaged to that special one; well, I am not married neither am I engaged but marriage is one thing that I’m so looking forward to.

I have heard so much and seen much gone wrong with marriages that it gives me a lot of concern however, no matter what happens in marriages, I do believe in marriage and I am looking forward to be married in the near future. God created marriage and He wouldn’t have created marriage if it wasn’t good.

No matter what our culture says, marriage is still God’s idea and a marriage that will work is a marriage that has God at its center. With that being said follow me as I share these thoughts with my future wife – whoever she is and wherever she may be.

Dear future wife, because I believe you are worth the wait, I’m in no hurry. I am patiently waiting on God to bring us together and whenever He puts us together is fine with me. He makes all things beautiful in His time. Until then, I'm waiting and serving. Can't wait to be with you and start a family with you my dear!

Marriage is a lot of work and with that in mind; I am fiercely preparing myself to be not just a great man but a godly man, a godly husband and a godly father. One that will lead our home in the way of the LORD and not according to what the culture says.

Dear future wife, I made a commitment to devote my life to Christ, letting Him shape me, mold me and make me into that godly man you’ve been waiting for. I make bold to say that I’m more in love with Jesus than I have ever been. And you are going to have a man after God’s heart for a husband.

Dear future wife, I can’t wait to ask your father your hand in marriage but before I do that, I will first go to your heavenly father and ask for your hand in marriage because when God approves of our union, your father will not disapprove. I can't wait to call you my wife, lover and best friend.

Dear future wife, I am striving daily to become a Job 31 man, because I want us to have a godly marriage. I want our marriage to be a module for many other marriages so we are going to have a close, Christ centered marriage relationship. I want people to see Christ in us and through us get to know Christ.

Dear future wife, let’s settle this absolutely: Sex for us will only be in marriage so until the day we exchange our marriage vows, be rest assured we will never mess with our bodies- God’s temple. Purity for us is not an option; it is a standard.

Dear Future Wife, No matter what life throws at us; divorce will never be an option. When we have rough times, we will pray through them and ask God for wisdom to work things out. I’m making a commitment in advance to be faithful to you all my life through thick and thin.

I need you to realize that conflicts are a normal part of a healthy relationship. It’s really not the absence of conflict that will determine whether or not we have good relationship but it’s knowing how to handle the conflicts that will (most certainly) arise will that determine whether or not we have good relationship.

I will never abandon you, not at anytime or in any form through all of life. You will be right by my side and our children will never be without a father. I promise you that I will make it home in time to spend quality time with you and our children.

Dear future wife, just so you know, I have been praying for you for everyday for the past five years and I won’t stop even after God brings us together. Here are some random prayers thoughts for you. All you have to do is say AMEN!

I pray that you will give your heart totally to Jesus Christ. I pray that you will treasure and cherish Him more than anything in this world. I pray that you will trust the Lord each day to get you through whatever life throws at you and grow in your relationship with Him daily.

I pray that Christ alone will always be enough as you as you wait on Him to bring us together. I pray that you will be contented with everything God has given you and that you will have patience to wait for the things He has promised you.

I pray that you become confident and humble. I pray that you become honest and kind. I pray that nothing will stop you from smiling and that you will always stay true to who you are. I pray that you will never lose faith in yourself and that you will stand apart from the crowd, set apart for Christ.

I pray that the LORD will protect you from all evil and grant you physical, spiritual and moral strength to fight temptations and difficulties. I pray that God will give you strength in areas where you are weak and strengthen you in every area of your life.

I pray that the LORD will God satisfy every desire of her heart, draw you close, consume your heart with His love, claim her passions, and may all that you strive to be draw you closer to God and He to you.

I pray that this prayers works for you in Jesus name. Amen!

Dear future wife, there is so much thoughts and prayers I want to share with you but I will take a bow here. I hope this piece blessed you.

Love,

Your future husband♥

-Emmanuel.

In closing, I want to encourage every unmarried person reading this by saying, marriage is a beautiful thing when it is done God’s way and hear this; there is a man/woman out there for you. Don’t stress, don’t sweat. God will bring him/her in His time but until then, make the most of your singleness for God.

Pray in advance for your future spouse, speak life and goodness into their life, tell God to keep him/her safe, cause him/her to grow into a godly man/woman and a godly husband/wife and fiercely prepare yourself towards marriage as you wait on God to bring you and my future spouse together.

Ladies if you loved this piece simply replace Dear Future Wife with Dear Future Husband.

Just Sharing My Thought

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Are you holding yourself back? - Free Yourself

The first half of 2013 has come and gone and the second half of the year is before us. Hmm! How has the year been for you?  For me, it’s been awesome I mean A W E S O M E… aside the privilege of being alive, God has done so much for me, with me and through me.

Now enough of me…. Let’s talk about you! Yes you. How has your year been?

Do you remember all the resolutions you made beginning of the year? You said you were going to work on your character, build an intimate relationship with God, pursue that degree, relocate, start that new project, get a new job, and get married and a whole lot more?

You remember don’t you? How far with all those plans? Are you living the life you said you are going to live? Are you pursing those dreams or are you holding yourself back from pursing them! The last thing you want to do is live a life full of incomplete dreams.

Six months have come and gone and I want you to EVALUATE yourself. Use the next SIX months to build on all your successes and where you haven’t done so well, do all you can to make the most of what’s left of the year.

One of the ironies of life is that many times, we hold ourselves back from living a passion filled, purposeful life without even knowing it. And usually it is over petty issues that very illogical to reason.
Do you give everything you do in life your all? Or are you holing yourself back in some way, in some aspect of life, without even knowing it?

The truth is, we all have fears but then, we must make sure we don’t allow our fears hold us back from living a passion-filled, purposeful life.

Many things hold us back from doing the things we want to do and becoming the person we want to become and I will just hit on a few of them randomly so here is where we begin...

They won’t like me!
Its human nature to want acceptance; nobody likes being rejected but when the fear of being rejected causes you to hold yourself back at key moments in life you might want to ask yourself which is important? “Being accepted or living your life for you?”  

It’s cynical to think you need other people to validate you, your thoughts, or actions before you live your God ordained life. Never allow people manipulate you through their misguided expectations of who they think you ought to be. Be who Christ want you to be, do what you know is right and enjoy your life. You don’t live to please people.

Procrastination!

Another thing that holds many back is procrastination. For me, overcoming procrastination is one of the biggest miracles of my life and if I could do it, you too can do it. The point is this: if something is not helping you then most likely, it is hurting you and procrastination we know has messed many (if not all of us) up.

The key to overcoming this cancer (procrastination) is DISCIPLINE. And what I mean by discipline is “doing what you are supposed to do, when you are supposed to do it whether you feel like doing it or not.” Trust me it is that simple.

What procrastination does is that it makes easy things hard and hard things harder. You need to realize that there is no substitute for doing the right things. Don’t allow procrastination cause you to hold yourself back.

Un-forgiveness!

 Un-forgiveness is one deep topic I cannot discuss in one single note but I’m going to run through it.

Forgiveness is not an option in life. It is a MUST. Why? Because in life, PEOPLE (even the ones you never thought would) are going to wrong/hurt you. It happens all the time. But you see forgiveness is not for the other person(s) per say it is for YOU.

There is absolutely no way, you are going to live a free and a healthy live without forgiveness. Un- forgiveness is you being in prison without being behind physical bars. Why would you want that?

It time you stop letting situations, what someone did or didn’t do, past guilt and mistake hold you back. Forgive yourself, free yourself and forgive them even if not for anything, so that GOD can forgive you. "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." (Matt 6:14-15).

My last thought on forgiveness is, just because you forgave someone doesn't mean you need to keep having dealings with them. There are some people you have to love and deal with from afar!

I talked extensively on “reaching forgiveness” in a different note. See it here http://sureboy.blogspot.com/2011/04/reaching-forgiveness.html

Sin!

When I mention sin as something that holds an individual back, I am not trying to be overly religious. I know some people may not agree with me on this but then, this isn’t public opinion. This is purely my thought and I know what I am saying.

Sin is an anomaly. It is a package deal that brings momentary satisfaction but has eternal consequences. And one of its consequences is that it holds you back. Do you know that God cannot bless sin? Read Psalms 1:1-3.

I do not intend to scare you with my preaching. As a matter of fact, I bring you hope. I need you to know that there is NO condemnation in Christ Jesus so never allow your past sins stop you from going to God. God is waiting for you with arms wide open. Just ask for forgiveness, and go to Him. When you ask God to forgive you, not only will He do it, but He will remember it NO MORE.

I can go on and on with this piece but I’m just going to round up here by saying stop making excuses, stop procrastinating, stop dwelling on squandered opportunities, forgive freely, run away from sin and live out your God ordained life.

God has not forgotten about the dreams He placed in your heart. He can change your entire life in a moment. He can make the rest part of this year the best part of the year for you. Rest in HIM.

So are you holding yourself back? – free yourself.

 Just Sharing My Thoughts

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